Went to Alishas today, we talked. It feels like an invisible wrestling match sometimes. Our words are soft and few. There is pain behind both of our words though. I think we are both afraid to be real, despite how real she says she is with me.
Im missing Peter right now, a lot. His dad, tics me off, never delivers phone messages like he says he will. Wrote a poem today...here it is. Its not one of my best, but its all real. Sometimes the real stuff isnt flowing, but it is beautiful.
Miss you baby
It was cool and sunny
uneven ground beneath my boots
dressed all pretty
for pictures for you
a dirty barn
with light shining through
leaned against the wall
wanting to say nothing at all
stop pointing that thing
Im not gonna talk
shes gonna get all of this isnt she
who the hell is....
He came to see me!
OMG
oopsI fell down
breath
stand up
wont let go
you cant make me
look up
hug tight
look back
the sun is bright
kiss him now
dont wake up.
It was all amazing
until you left
It was raining
silent sadness
home again
sitting on the porch
just your scent broke me
I cried all day
everything reminded me
of that week
when you swept me off my feet
but you'll be back
You've made clear of this
next time
an even sweeter kiss.
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