Its late but I wanna post a blog, my hands feel like typing. I know Im thinking too far in the future lately, but its not bad to have goals. With Matt, I honestly dont care if we marry or not. Im just glad to have the time I have with him.
Ive been doing a lot lately, that isnt very "Christian" of me. I know its wrong and for what reasons, but how can something that seems so right, be so wrong? I wanna be better, Matt seems to be a better Christian than me lately anyway. He kinda keeps me in check, but I push him away a little in that aspect. I feel bad, yet I dont, thats the scary part. I think Im in a "Its my fucking life" stage. I know the things I need to stop, I just dont want to. I miss church though, I dont have anyone to go with, or take me.
Another random tangent, I really want my poetry published. I dont know when though. I think it'll be when Im 25, cause thats the number that always pops in my head. Its also a good span of time, for a collection of poems. Shows the changes within life and time, and gives me time to work on a second book ;) haha. I know Im talented and that I can get someone to notice me, its just gonna take time. If theres one thing Im confident with, its my skills in poetry. (Granted my grammar is sloppy) but that can be fixed with some effort, I just dont put effort in grammar, in blog posts. Its always good to have a dream in life, and Im gonna follow through on this, some way, some how.
No comments:
Post a Comment